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I Kan't Spell



Saturday, August 30, 2003

 
That Wasn't Me

So I went out for my last night in Hyungdai last night. This is the club scene. It's like New Orleans met New York and they had a sit down and said, "Right let's have big huge clubs like your city but we'll let people walk around in the street and not charge covers or have any bullshit like your city. Sounds good." And they shook hands and this place was born. Every club I have gone to in America has sucked unless I was under the influence of more than alcohol but here man, here I go out and shake my fat ass every weekend. And here you don't feel any pretensciousness( sp?)in the club. There's no guys with tight black shirts walking around with gel in their hair (well there are but you can whoop their ass anyway so it doesnt matter) And all this doesn't add up to the bonus of you getting to be a rock star all the time just because your eyes are round. It's not as fancy as American clubs and the music sometimes suffers but damn oh damn I have never had more fun in a dancing environment then since I have been here. Anyway...that's the club scene here...it's so friendly and wonderful that you can't not like it....

But after the club is when the fun begins. The best fun to be a part of is the drunken Korean girls. You know by now that Koreans love their booze and it doesn't take little 90 pound girls too much to get hemmed so imagine if you will a small sea of wabbling straight black haired girls in short skirts or tight(more baggy than our version of tight) jeans falling all over themselves in the street at 4 in the morning just dying to live out some sort of fantasy. I mean, that's what you do when you get drunk, you let go of whatever is inside of you at that moment and luckily for us westerners that notion is often, "Man I really just want to have sex with a westerner". So woohoo! You see me waiting on the corner like a taxi driver at the airport just knowing that soon enough someone is going to want a ride. But of all the nights, last night being my last there, I had to choose poorly (like India Jones). We went to a little Ramin joint and sat down across from two swaying Korean girls and invited them over to drink, they were bombed and I told them I was an astronaut and since they didn't really understand what that was, they found it interesting. Well within five minutes I have my tongue down this things throat and after another five minutes I look over and she's sort of swaying. And then she spits. And then you know what's coming. She just hurls on the floor. She then gets up looks at me, after I have been trying to get her in a cab for the ride back to Bret's magic palace, and she says "Kaja".(Let's go) She's got some puke dripping off her face and I just can't help but laugh. And then her friend sees her puke and she pukes and then they both fall in the puke and drunkinly roll around. She then proceeds to continue her requestful ways and says, "Kaja". I guess you had to be there, but to see her covered in vomit walking up the street with her Gucci handbag and puke covered designer jeans, was just so damn what Korea has been so many nights.

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