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I Kan't Spell



Saturday, September 13, 2003

 
I Just Spilled My Fucking Apple Juice and other Randoms

Thanks to Doug I just laughed and spilled my apple juice all over the floor --
    mr. oppenheim, if you could give me a description, even a technical one, of "how the internet works" i am prepared to treat you to a night of a thousand blow jobs in the five-star hotel penthouse of your choosing, you dumb fuck.


God people are so creatively smart some days that I just fill up with this weird pride and envy of knowing them. Laughing kicks hard nipples.

  • I swear I can never get enough of Eddie Murphy stand up.
  • Do you ever converse with your friends in borrowed dialogue that doesn't necessarily capture anything other than the moment. And you laugh harder and feel better. What does that really say about the way we interact?
  • I'm fucking tired of our apologies. Next on the list it will say something like, "The United States would like to apologize for using the people of Zaire as slave labor and raping their natural resources to support our own consumer blob economy. We would also like to extend an "Our bad" for the dictators we have set up and than had to assasinate. We are still working out the kinks in our world domination self-interest plan. Thank you for your patience. We would also like to extend our deepest regrets to the people of San Salvador. Know that your children's face melting from toxic gas will one day help us rid the world of terror. And remember that 'Saving Nemo 2' is coming out next week directly to DVD. Have a nice day!"
  • "Your wife is a big foot isn't she Gus? You shaved the bitch down and taught her to speak."
  • These are the Democratic hopefuls.
      Howard Dean, former governor of Vermont
      Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts
      Senator John Edwards of North Carolina
      Senator Bob Graham of Florida
      Senator Joe Lieberman of Connecticut
      Representative Dick Gephardt of Missouri
      Representative Dennis Kucinich of Ohio
      Carol Moseley Braun, former Illinois senator
      Al Sharpton,Civil rights advocate

    One word "fucked"....Have you seen any of these guys on Meet the Press or Hardball. I have never seen a bigger bunch of goofs in my life. Freakin John Kerry was made to look like the biggest piece of cardboard in history when he tried to take on the "working man's Stalin" Donald Rumsfeld. Oh man I hope Nader or somebody runs and they have riots in the fucking street over not letting him on National debates.
  • "It's quite possible that I'm you third man girl. BUt it's a fact that I'm the seventh son...let's have a ball and a biscuit sugar" How can you not love that song?

  • Comments: Post a Comment



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