It just became very obvious to me that this thing has started to affect my mood sometimes. It really hasn't been the creative source I had hoped it would turn into. It's a nice place to keep some things but it doesn't feel developed or well thought out in any way. Given my propensity to want to feel quantitative, I struggle with the inability to find progress or pleasure without results. Quite frankly, it has become rather humiliating to read what I write. I need to stop for a little while. Everyone had their rogue years, Jesus, Stalin, Alexander...you know all those guys. It has become evident, what do they call it...an epiphany...Something feels very wrong about the things I write.
