Disappointed
I think the old saying goes, "Fool me once; shame on you. Fool me twice; shame on me." (I don't think the semi-colons are necessary, then again I never really learned how to punctuate.) Last night I was supposed to have dinner with Mirel.
I called her about 7 times and got no answer. Deep down inside I hope nothing bad happened or that some excuse is there to lay claim to her inability to return a call. But, I get the feeling that's not it at all. Strangely it's quite befitting for the month that I have had. I don't know what would bring this on. She sounded excited on Saturday. She sounded like she needed to talk and that having dinner with me was something that would make her happy. I know it was something that I was looking forward to.
All in all it was a rather tragic evening for me. I went out with people from work and drank Jameson and Waters at a rate that would scare any tame corporate American. On my way home all you could hear me whimper was, "I would never hurt her. I don't understand." And that's all I kept thinking.
My stomach is in knots. My arms and legs don't feel alive at all and there seems to a reservoir of emotion sitting behind my eyes and mouth. The New Year can't come fast enough.
