In More Detailed Response
A real look at me: Well I guess I have been wanting to do this since I saw it on
Oliver's page. Ain't nobody out there looking for my ass. But, at the same time, I sort of want to rehash. So hereeeee.....we go. Oh and I wanted to legitimately answer ole 'Anonymous' in Iowa up there.
Who are you? I am Bret Matthew Scharf Holmes? Well...umm...I can't describe me really. You are better off asking someone else because I have some weird views of myself. Girls describe me different than guys do and people who know me describe me way different than people who don't. So...you are more likely to get a better answer from them. I think (think) that I am the following:
Straight forward
Filterless
Passionate
Angry
Bitter
Smart
Giving
Protective
Scholarly
Hard Worker
Funny
Sarcastic
Judgmental
What do I want? - Um I want the spark. I want to be turned on every moment in my life. That's why I chase drama. I don't like routines and I don't like apathy. Since I get mildly depressed from time to time that seems to work against me because it spirals. But hell, who doesn't get salty?
Anyway, professionally...what do I want to do? Umm..I used to say , "Change the way people learn.". Currently I like music and I like to write. Neither of which I can do well or even not at all. So...I'm always around music and books. I don't consider myself an aficionado but I read and listen to my share. Computers seem to be what I am sorta good at but so is everyone. I have to use my creative skills in this field to develop something. First I have to get my energy back. Second I have to retain focus. Third, I have to make the right moves. I feel as though I have aligned myself to be able to make moves. The lacking aspect is the idea and the focus. I'm working on that.
What do I want personally? Well...I would like to have a family. But most importantly I want a shell. I want a bubble where just and someone else can be and not need anything. I don't need a village to raise me. I just need someone to believe in and believe in me back. I'm not a big personal guy. Most people around me know that I take care of them before I take care of myself. Well...most people I guess know that. Some may disagree but fuck them.
The weird thing about this description is that if you asked me a year ago it would have been totally different. Well maybe not totally but different. And, if you ask me a month from now, it will be different again. I'm not a wizard. I don't have answers. I feel things. I put them into sweet metaphors. I make people laugh and cry and I laugh and cry just as much as they do. So...that's me.
