Bretholmes.com - Bret Holmes Baltimore Md

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I Kan't Spell



Thursday, January 27, 2005

 
I call your 100

1. I have night sweats.
2. I once pooped in the ocean and threw it on a kid who knocked over my sandcastle.
3. My mother and I would take vacations without my father when I was little.
4. My job requires that I travel half of the year.
5. I can speak Korean pretty well.
6. I didn't know the Rolling Stones song "Angie" was Angie. I used to always sing "Angel".
7. I played an entire soccer game on a broken foot when I was 11.
8. The first real curve ball I ever saw, I ducked under it and it hit me in the face.
9. I have had the following nicknames : chronological (Blue, Nootz, Nuh uh, Tic Turd, Pumpkin Head, Cabbage Patch, Chubby Cheeks, Flat Face, Holmesy, Sherlock, White Lightning, Bert, Treb, Bart, Terb, Peanut Butter, Boone, ODBret, Stump, Smoketastic, Tastic, Licious, Scharf)
10. I once bit a kid in the faec because it was the only way I could win the fight.
11. I have never had acne or zits.
12. The worst injury I ever had was tearing my rotator cuff, because it makes you think you can still play but in actuality you can't.
13. Most of my friends are people I have played sports with.
14. I believe you trust and love the people you knew in innocence and you learn from, grow with, and challenge the people you meet as you get older.
15. My favorite sandwich is the ultimate Grilled Cheese (two pieces of Texas toast, 4 cheese: provolone, Swiss, American, cheddar, ham, bacon, onions, tomato, *green peppers/Texas Pete optional)
16. I once stole an Opus stuffed animal from the world trade center when I was 8. My Mom didn't make me take it back.
17. I used to open up my xmas presents and play with them before xmas.
18. I would not eat lunch for an entire week at middle school just so I could save enough money to buy a medium pepperoni pizza from domino's on Friday afternoons.
19. I wear a size 10 shoe.
20. I wear a size 7 1/8 hat.
21. I don't like other people's lists that turn into gospels about stuff that they feel or whatever - I like lists about shit that happened.
22. The best feeling I ever had was throwing out a runner at home from deep center field in a tie ball game at Camden yards in a state high school all star game. There was only 2 outs after that so I got to see the whole crowd stand and cheer. My grandfather was there. He had never seen me play baseball before.
23. I never "wanted the ball".
24. The ball always seemed to come to me though and somehow I managed to be ok.
25. I used to wear my baseball uniform to school in middle school because we had button down uniforms that had stitched on numbers.
26. Baltimore is a very small town. Most of my friends that live here seem to know everyone in some way or another.
27. Bartenders I know (Billy, Six, Tols, Yana, Chirstina, Heather, Tori, Danny, Danny, Danny, Mini, Craig, Jason, J, Jeremy, Fest, Watts, Pam, Sarah, Diane, Jamie, Jamie) That's awful.
28. My favorite drink is a Glenlivet 18 neat. 29. My second favorite drink is a Glenlivet on the rocks.
30. My standard go to drink is a Jameson and water.
31. My "Bret is in a bad fuckin mood" drink is 3 shots, bud bottle, and a Jameson and water.
32. I take my passport with me every where I go because you don't get moved to the clothes removal line as much.
33. I would like to live in California but I can't see myself wanting to leave Baltimore.
34. I'm looking forward to Oliver moving back to the are during the summer.
35. I'm looking forward to reading Tim's book, making notes, and then arguing about it.
36. I'm gonna kick Doug in the nuts when I see him because him and I are lazy.
37. No, I will never be in a band. But I would make a solid light guy, and consultant.
38. An album that I would vouch for that no one owns or even knows exists is Teenage Fanclub's Badndwagonesque.
39. I just want a girlfriend I can go record shopping with and makes me laugh (good luck).
40. Very few people can make me laugh.
41. Actually no one can make me laugh; well Mike and Watts can because we have an equal level of making fun of each other.
42. I have spit out more drinks laughing being with those two than anyone I have ever met.
43. I don't like to read James Joyce. Then again I don't like going to the doctor either. Both are good for you.
44. I don't believe in medicine.
45. I'll eat raw fish but not if it's rolled in rice and seaweed.
46. I have never had a good birthday.
47. I have never had a good Christmas.
48. Growing up my family life was very awkward. It's not that it was bad, it was just extremely strange at times. My mother was a classic 8 and my father was well...me. That poor woman.
49. My biggest fear next to death is becoming my father.
50. My realization is that that is soooo happening.
51. I would like to have children and a wife but feel that I am far too screwed up to ever attempt that.
52. I think people who clip coupons should be shot in the face.
53. I think people that spend more than a split second making up their mind on purchasing clothes or furniture should also be shot in the face.
54. I find men who wear cheap designer clothing (banana republic, ab +fitch, american eagle) to be boring, lazy, and someone who unless I already know them I would not want to know. What you choose to assimilate says enough for me.
55. I am still very awkward around groups of people.
56. I don't like Thai food.
57. I like Korean food a lot mainly for the memories.
58. I want someone to eat Korean food with.
59. I own 7 watches. Why?
60. This is how I like to read: I pick a book that seems interesting. I read the biography of the author (if possible - good luck finding a Kundera bio), I read a little about the history surrounding the place and time the book was written. Then I read the book.
61. I want to start watching more risque movies.
62. I want to have a dinner and movie date that does not involve singing Otis Redding, ordering drinks, talking about ex-loves, or compliments of any kind.
63. I wish when I said that I don't want to go out that people would not only believe but respect it.
64. When I walk into a bar I immediately look around for any signs of friction, I.e. guys who I may want to fight or have fought, girls I have slept with, dorks I don't want to see.
65. I kiss people all the time when I'm drunk. And I am that guy who says shit like, "I love you. No no no I really do."
66. My father slept naked throughout my entire life and it weirds me out to this day.
67. I used to hear my parents having sex and would get really freaked out by it.
68. I believe whole heartedly that poor people have better sex.
69. I don't believe in karma or destiny or heaven or an afterlife.
70. I think the bible is a good story that was brought into play in the middle ages to control people.
71. I don't believe in Buddha, yoga, Elvis, the United States, the Bill of Rights, or malls.
72. Every time I have ever felt bad all I have to do is be around girls and I feel very alive.
73. My style of flirting is direct and abrasive. It doesn't work too much.
74. I wish I had bigger hands so people wouldn't assume so much.
75. I used to love the Dukes of Hazard, MacGyver**, and Alf.
** Holy shit it spell checked MacGyver for me

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Benjy Ferree - 4.8
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Quote(S)
Like the guy with the beard? YES - like the guy with the beers. What? Yep

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The time I almost killed a child
July 4th in Korea
Excerpts from Demian
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So you think you are a Baltimorian
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Tech Language
Why I love Oasis
I would go to war
"You Son of a Bitch" An Open Letter to Tom Friend
Dance to Your Ocean
Dream Ranch
When men become pussies
Jason Whitlock is a racist propaganda promoter
Pitchfork takes music snobbery to new level
The Cosmic Clash of the Red Sox and Cubs
The Hatred that is Runts Candy
Starting corporate line-up
Google Bio
Do you know me? List 1 / List 2 / List 3
The Night I Burned Philly Down
So You Want to be a Booze Hound
She Said it was Free
Funniest Corporate Story Ever
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Death Peddle
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Pieces of Morning
Oasis Album Revew
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Starting Fires With Grass Stains
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Stupid Secrets
Stupid Secrets the Return


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