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I Kan't Spell



Tuesday, March 21, 2006

 
Happy Birthday Dad

Just simply writing him an email that says "Happy birthday Dad" is bad enough. There is no "Love Bret" or "Your Loving Son" or "Hope to See You Soon" at the end to maybe comfort him, or even me. All there is is some distant hatred, resentment, and awkwardness that should not come from two people that loved each other as much as him and I did.

Countless nights I have spent crying and punching walls over my father. I would get so upset over how much I missed him and how much he destroyed my life. There was no physical abuse or heavy drug use or domestic violence that you may think to blame. There was only a very hurt and confused man that was hurting everyone around him. You can't really get mad at nature for the tornado it created that smashed the trailer park. You just have to realize that sometimes nature is a motherfucker. On the same hand, you also don't want to live in that trailer park or ever see a tornado again after it has ripped apart your home.

There are so many good times that I remember having with my father that I well up in the eyes just thinking about them. There was the way he used to jerk the car from left to right to make me roll across the big L seat of the front of his car. There was no one that could talk to me or make me laugh like my father. There were the countless nights of Gin, Scrabble, Boggle, and Trivial Pursuit. I owe every mental attribute or accolade and the formation of my love of laerning to my father. There were "Bret" days where I didn't have to go to school and we would go to the movies, museums, baseball games, and to some place really cool to eat lunch. There were the times when he was my biggest fan and got more joy out of seeing me succeed than any sense of pride I had ever seen in a man's face.

While he was still him, he was a very good father to me.

I won't go into the negative things because believe it or not this is his birthday wish and the toast that I'll never be able to give him. I'll never be able to kiss his old wrinkled forehead and have him lift up his grand children. These sentences are all I have in lieu of holding his hand as he becomes old. These words are in substitution of the life that we won't ever get to share.

I miss my father.

I love you Dad. Have a Happy Birthday.

Your loving son,
Bret

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Favorites List
Pandora Song List
Amazon Wish List
Reading
Revolutionary Wealth - Tofflers
Brian Jones

Things Making Me Smile
The City
Newness
Listening - [out of 5]
Benjy Ferree - 4.8
The Thermals 3.1
David Gray 3.8

Quote(S)
Like the guy with the beard? YES - like the guy with the beers. What? Yep

Bands That I Check Schedules For
Badly Drawn Boy
Belle and Sebastian
Benjy Ferree
The Black Keys
Deerhoof
Drive By Truckers
The Eels
Enon
Kimya Dawson
Mark Hopkins Band
Oasis
Iron and Wine
Mates of State
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Two if By Sea
Ween

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9:30 Club
Black Cat
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Fletcher's
8x10
The Knitting Factory
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Recher Theatre
Sonar

Places I Eat/Drink in the Flesh
Aldo's
Bishop's Collar
Boccacio's
Cross Street Market
Hull Street
Joun Gak
Mick O'Shea's
No Way Jose
Porter's
The Irish Pub
Turner's
The Waterfront Hotel

My Greatest Hits (that's so lame)

The time I almost killed a child
July 4th in Korea
Excerpts from Demian
Why I screen phone calls
Bret's Death Metal Report
A conversation at a cocktail party
A conversation at breakfast
So you think you are a Baltimorian
A conversation about a girl singer
Observations from a bar
Observations of strippers
Tech Language
Why I love Oasis
I would go to war
"You Son of a Bitch" An Open Letter to Tom Friend
Dance to Your Ocean
Dream Ranch
When men become pussies
Jason Whitlock is a racist propaganda promoter
Pitchfork takes music snobbery to new level
The Cosmic Clash of the Red Sox and Cubs
The Hatred that is Runts Candy
Starting corporate line-up
Google Bio
Do you know me? List 1 / List 2 / List 3
The Night I Burned Philly Down
So You Want to be a Booze Hound
She Said it was Free
Funniest Corporate Story Ever
Striped Shirts and the Fucks that Wear Them
Death Peddle
NEW!!!
Pieces of Morning
Oasis Album Revew
The Art of Tipping
Starting Fires With Grass Stains
Bret's Federal Hill Food Review
Sexcapades and your Picture on the Internet
Stupid Secrets
Stupid Secrets the Return


Contact Me

Stuff I Swing By From Time to Time

- MUSIC
Donewaiting.com
hive3.com
Indie Video Archive
Large Hearted Boy
Important Records
Oasis News
Pitch Fork Media
Reptilian Records
Scenestars MP3 Blogs
Sound Garden Baltimore

- BUY
Aloud.com
Pre-Shrunk
Shotgun Apparel
Warrior Clothing

- HUMOR
Angry Little Girls
Atom Films
Eye Envision
Homestar Runner
Kill Frog
Junior Varsity Meat Market

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Baltimore City Paper
The Baltimore Sun
Calvert Hall
Degroen's Brewers
ESL Cafe
Fantasy Sports
Korean Herald
Villa Julie College Baseball
W3 Schools



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