All these pictures
I see pictures of friends gathered together. They are celebrating birthdays and restaurant openings. business anniversaries, even church events, or other children’s birthdays.
I don’t have any pictures like this in the last 10 years. I always rain water on them. I’m just not a happy person that way. I can throw a party. I can bring people together that likely want to see each other - but at no point does anyone want to see me. Or maybe they do and I shut it down.
But I get sad seeing these photos. I get sad knowing I don’t have these kinds of relationships - maybe I never did - maybe it was my decision all along or... as I always assume - maybe I’m just an asshole.
